Au Revoir Simone, Neimo, and John Oates’ Magical Monster Mashing Mustache

Hey there faithful readers, sorry for the late update, but yours truly spent the long weekend celebrating Martin Luther King Day in the most appropriate way – doubling down in Atlantic City. Truth be known, I would actually still be taking in all the breathtaking slums and blight of “Less Vegas” had it not been for a quirk in New Jersey State law. Apparently, a guy who’s had a few drinks and is having a good time is no longer welcome at the Craps tables at the Trump Marina. Oh yeah and some other crap about gambling bottomless with a loaded handgun in full view, whatever. The message is clear: NEW JERSEY HATES FUN (and also smog-free, non-infectious air). Anyway the point is, I’m back, I’m 200 bucks richer, and I’m fucking excited. You know why? Two big reasons, actually. First off, Au Revoir Simone on Uncensoredinterview.com. You might’ve heard their stuff on Grey’s Anatomy (unless you’re a MAN like me, in which case, you don’t even know what Grey’s Anatomy is, or why in the world George never told his mother about he and Callie’s divorce), but did you ever wonder if they’ve ever, you know, WATCHED Grey’s Anatomy?

And once you’ve had your fill of Williamsburg’s favorite estrogen-fueled electronic pop group, you can also check out our other big update this week – French New Wave Rockers Neimo.

Remember folks, this is just a taste of the awesome new content we’ve got for you this week, and the only way to get it all is to visit us right here, or here, or even here. Whatever works for you.

Before I go to count my winnings again, I had to mention this story that I found while slacking off at work this past week. Apparently, and I really wish I was fucking with you about this, John Oates, of seminal 80′s duo Hall & Oates, is developing a cartoon about his thick, gorgeous mustache having super powers. I’m actually speechless. This is either going to be the best or the absolute WORST cartoon in history. It will either be lauded and recognized at award shows the world over for its creativity and humor, or banned in most non-Christian nations. I’m hoping it becomes a big hit, because I have THE BEST idea to branch this baby out: Cloverfield 2: Monster Versus Mustache. That’s right, John Oates’ magnificent, erection arousing lip warmer taking on the 40 story tall, unstoppable destructive beast that destroyed the entire island of Manhattan. The fight of the century. Again, it has the chance to be either be the greatest action movie of all time, or the most painfully terrible images ever electronically dictated to film strip, even worse than Spider-Man 3. And of course, there’s gonna be a huge twist at the end, when the monster and the mustache finally face off in the cataclysmic battle for the fate of Earth – The Monster grows its own mustache!! Dun dun duh!!! But wait!!! Just when all seems lost, our superpowered mustache grows John Oates, and it just so happens that “Kicking Some Monster Ass” is on his list, right below “Your Kiss.” I won’t ruin the ending for you, you’ll have to go see it when it comes out. I’m shooting for a Christmas 2010 release.