While pop music may be wonderful in Quincy Coleman’s eyes (heck, mine too), there are some who think the stuff is straight up awful. But please wait before you roll your eyes and think “Been there, done that.” I happened to read an interview on Idolator the other day where an engineer revealed “secrets” about pop music. Secrets? Really? I thought most of the stuff they covered was pretty common knowledge.

Throughout the article they cover some pretty basic stuff, like how often artists will come in drunk or stoned and get all frustrated basically because they are drunk or stoned. Autotune and “fixing it in the mix” is discussed, but supposedly the big revelation of the article (or at least I would assume due to the piece followed by the reaction of “Are you serious?” by the interviewer)…

(READ MORE NOT-SO SECRETS)

Some things I’ve been pondering (and now you can too) over this crazy (but hopefully fruitful) Halloween-Election Weekend.

Why is it OK for a plumber to talk politics but not a musician?

Aubrey thinks music consumers need to get their shit together:

My friend Josh only eats potato chips and cereal. Occasionally he’ll eat a burger or a sandwich but mostly he has the diet of an 11-year-old latch key kid. Until six months ago he’d never eaten sushi. Though Josh does indeed love potato chips and cereal, his love of these things aren’t the sole reason he eats them.
When I was a kid my best friend’s little brother would only eat peanut butter. That was all he wanted to eat. When his parents tried to cure him of this socially awkward nut butter fancy by putting a giant bowl of it in front of him and forcing him to eat it, he ate it all and asked for more.

With Josh it’s different. He carb-loads out of laziness. Chips and cereal are easy. They’re portable, tasty, they’ll quickly remove the pangs of hunger without all of those pesky nutrients, and they’re available virtually everywhere. Josh would eat other things, unlike the peanut-butter hound, but he’s just got other priorities and a culinary deficiency. He’s surviving fine the way things are and doesn’t feel that the added bonus of eating healthier, tastier food will be worth the extra effort it will take to figure out how to cook his own vegetables.

(READ MORE ON VITAMIN DEFICIENCY)

The Muslims might not realize it right now, but the official death of the music industry is at hand. How do I know this? Because Matty and Brian’s all time favorite band, Guns N’ Roses, will finally be releasing Chinese Democracy on November 23rd. This record had better be fucking good, because production started around the beginning of the Iraq War. THE FIRST IRAQ WAR! That’s over 15 goddamn years in the making! To put that into perspective, Chinese Democracy is OLDER than Miley Cyrus, file sharing, The Tampa Bay Rays, reality TV and the entire Mighty Ducks trilogy.

(READ MORE ABOUT THE MUSICAL APOCALYPSE)

One of the main reasons people give for not being more environmentally friendly is how much effort and money it takes to live greener. Sure, converting your automobile to biodiesel and installing solar panels on your dog might be a little extreme and therefore not for everyone, but it’s not actually not that hard to start living a more eco-friendly life. In fact, I realized the other day that I live one of the greenest lives out of anyone I know, and it’s all because of one special trait that I proudly carry: LAZINESS.

For decades, eco-enthusiasts have made valiant efforts to show ordinary people that by exerting just a little more energy, they can help save the planet. Sounds easy enough, right? Then why are people, for the most part, still refusing to heed the call to help ensure a better future? Four simple words, folks: People Are Fucking Lazy.

(READ MORE IT AIN’T EASY BEING GREEN)

I found myself overloaded on CMJ last week and my brain hasn’t really been able to think of much else since. Though I did day-by-day coverage over the course of the week, I thought I’d do a look-back and run some superlatives just like in high school.

Best Dressed, Male: Project Jenny, Project Jan (Wednesday @ Pianos)
I expected some stiff competition from Yip-Yip in this category, but their new costumes aren’t quite as amazing as the old ones. As a result, Jeremy Haines from Project Jenny, Project Jan easily snags this spot by donning his white suit looking sharp and stylish at Ear Farm’s party Wednesday at Pianos.

(more…)

Fatkidslovescake got her first eye infection this week through some inexplicable fluke of nature! Actually, it was probably from falling asleep with my contact lenses in. Please, don’t say it. It is sooo bad for my eyes. Yes, of course it is. But c’mon, it happens every once in a while after a late night out. And who ever thinks that some moderate carelessness will come back to bite them in the proverbial ass? Not I, said the fatkid.

Now, I was feeling pretty sorry for myself. Not only am I going to have to sport the perma-tired I-just-rolled-out-of-bed look for two weeks, classified by the puffy eyes, glasses and no make-up, but it is just all around super uncomfortable. The dry eyes, the itching, the burning… Oh! Did I mention I have to show up at a wedding looking like this?

Sure, things could be worse, but sometimes you don’t want to be an adult about things. Sometimes you want to throw yourself a little pity party. That’s right! I think you should be allowed to blow up some balloons, throw a little confetti and do it up proper!

Then, I watched this clip of Ben Taylor. (If you haven’t seen this already folks, you HAVE TO watch it. You couldn’t make up a story like this if you wanted to!)

Suffice it say that I felt pretty damn stupid after this. I’m going to shut up now and see if I can squeeze something spectacular out of my swollen eye…perhaps a tear.